Written in the style of

“This feckin’ hurts. I hope someone appreciates it”

Greetings fellow perves. I am not so new having contributed one ‘short’ piece some time ago. Older perves may well remember it.

My old tadger DB got in touch with me. He’s having a few health problems at the moment so he asked if I could write a few words on his behalf. Since he cannot see the keyboard, monitor or even the tv screen that clearly at present, he dictated this to my loyal secretary. Two shorthand notebooks later, this was the result.

Not too much about this medical condition. But I would not wish it on even my worse enemies. Ok. Maybe two or three of them. But I knew that you would miss these words so there you go.

I heard on the grapevine that a new tasty flavour has been introduced. One with perfect white twin scoops. And all topped off with a couple of firm ripe cherries.

And talking of ripe cherries, of the few minutes of last night’s show I could afford myself before yet another so early night, I imagined that this new flavour had been allowed to stay up later than me. But given the state of my eyesight at present I then realised it was HIM. And I would also swear that he had been visiting the novelty shop and was clutching a Ken doll sticking pins into it clearly in reaction to receiving a phone call from Russell Brand. But it was my head that was reacting to the pins.

But back for a few moments to this week’s hot topic – Ice-cream. So I paid Luigi a quick visit as that, in my mind was the only less sensible cause for this week’s problems. “You ordaa ice-cream in October . What do you expect ? There is no demand for it these days. But what did you buy. Was it a soft one or a Soft one. The difference ? Well a Soft one usually comes on twin cones with a little occasional raspberry sauce whereas a soft one is smothered with dressings so you hardly taste the flavours. But you probably had a cold one. Left in the fridge for too long and tends to run away if it comes into contact with any heat”

And, before my one good eye, the ticker ran to announce the new shows soon to be seen. So many questions to be answered. Will ‘Dream Screens to be the 7th book of The Decameron (in my mind the inspiration of the earlier ventures) ? Was SMS How missing a vital letter or will the commercial reasoning behind the earlier afternoon efforts now come through ?. Will Bohemian Nights to be a case of Big Sister does their show from Franz Towers ? Will the Barbie Show be a reunion of all the original pretty things ? And will the Picture-in-Picture Show just mean even more double vision for me.

Answers to these, and more important things, next week.

Fantastic, i really like the surprises... i am here wishing the best for Eurotic television.. good luck to all the staff !

and of course.. many kisses to all the girls ^_^